First time crying in front of my boyfriend

I can now say I had my first crying experience in front of Jay. It happened on Saturday, and if that wasn't enough, I did it again on Sunday.

I'll backtrack and provide an overview first.

Friday night, Jay arrived late and was not able to make it to my work event. I even had time to hang out with friends at a music festival before coming home to meet him. We went shopping for foam rollers because I've been in pain over the last few weeks from some kind of muscle pinch/sprain. We also got food and snacks for our Saturday road trip!  During the first hour with Jay, I was miserable. I was in pain, I was exhausted, and I was in no mood to entertain.  30 minutes of intense foam rolling later, I was much much better. I also slept wonderfully, despite my fears that my body would be in too much achey-ness and to sleep with someone else.

Saturday morning, we woke up, had eggs, bacon, and some leftover kale/tofu/tomato, and then left for a 4 hour road trip to the Blues festival. We talked the whole trip and listened to music. Upon arriving at the festival, we saw my friend Andrew, who by the way, looks vaguely similar to B., which prompted a flash-flood of memories that haunted me and our road trip back home. The music fest was fun, but after 2 walks around the event, we were both tired and somewhat bored. We ate, drank, shopped, and were ready to head home! On the way back, Jay somehow started talking about birth control options and recounted friends of his telling him that Plan B is a mortifying experience. At first, I decided not to say anything, but then I took a deep breath, took a risk, and told him that I had that horrific experience when I had to once stand in line for Plan B. I described the humiliation of having to show your driver's license ID in order to get that little pill. Meanwhile, B. had wandered off in the store to buy chocolates or find whatever it was he wanted. As I told this story, my emotions began to build and I soon found myself tearing up.  It was terrible. We were about 30 minutes away from home and I was driving while crying.

At first, Jay thought I was cold and asked if I had the sniffles. I put up my hoodie so he couldn't see me in the dark, but for some reason, the crying wouldn't stop. Eventually, Jay realized and asked me if I wanted to talk about it. I was so embarrassed that I said no and kept crying. I told him bits and pieces. And I explained that my feelings were likely erupting having seen that B. recently "found" me to know where I am. Jay didn't say much, but he was a good listener and said that he would "take care of it" if B. ever came to find me. It was comforting to hear him say that. Eventually, I stopped crying because I know that Jay is so different and that the past is the past.

I also cried on Sunday but I'll save that for my next post. Just recounting this crying experience drained me.