Double-dating with brothers

One of the best parts of yesterday was spending time with Jay's brother and his girlfriend, Cathy. They joined us toward the later part of the night so we had dinner together. They've been in a 3-year long-distance relationship so Cathy has had extensive history with both brothers and their parents! She talked at length about how great their parents were, and how excited she was for me to meet them this weekend. As though I wasn't already secretly excited, her enthusiasm was got me even more pumped! I couldn't be happier luckier that Cathy will be in town so that we can spend time with their parents together.

Toward the end of dinner, I excused myself to go to the restroom and Cathy asked to join me. In that short amount of time, she detailed to me, her relationship history with Jay's brother and their plans to be reunited in the next half-year. She also asked about Jay and my plans for the future, to which, I couldn't answer her question.

All I could say was that our relationship is new and I'm not sure what the future holds. Having been in my predicament in her relationship, Cathy expressed empathy and said that it was similar when she first met jay's brother. She exhibited such excitement for our relationship, exclaiming how cute we were as a couple and how evident it is that Jay and I like and enjoy being with each other.

While we were in the restroom, I also blurted out to Cathy how intimidating it is to date Jay given his previous relationship being 10 years-long! How do you follow something like that? Cathy's reaction was magnificent though. At first, she was surprised that it was such a long courtship between them. Then she added, "oh, but she was a bitch!"

As petty, un-feminist, and embarrassing as it is to admit-- I was so pleasantly surprised to hear such a negative reaction of Jay's ex Apparently, based on Cathy's report, Jay's ex-girlfriend was quite vulgar and would curse in front of their parents! Of course, I can't confirm if that's actually true. However, it is quite appalling to imagine such a level of disrespect. Additionally, it's nice to have something to be able to differentiate myself from her; knowing I could never do or say anything like that.  

But then again, I also wondered if anyone would ever describe me that way: vulgar.  I want to say no, but my humor can be pretty crude and my jokes can be perverted. Is that the same as vulgar? I hope not! I'd really like to be different from his last girlfriend.

Cathy was very expressive about wanting to spend more time together to talk about the brothers. Her openness, friendliness, and enthusiasm was contagious and fun. She already feels like a little sister and at the end of the night, my friends remarked she could be my potential and future sister-in-law. They were joking when they said this of course-- but my heart skipped a beat and I wondered about the possibilities...  I do love double dates and group outings; and yesterday was the best of everything and more.

The upcoming weekend is quickly approaching and I am so excited to spend time with what could potentially be my future family. (Is that so exaggerated and dramatic?) I am pretty embarrassed and excited at the same time.

Meeting Prince Charming

I've envisioned falling in love since I was a child. My earliest memory dates back to elementary school when I started having crushes and wondering about whether he (and there were so many potentials) would be my prince charming.

In junior high, my friends laughed thought I was naive and silly when I vowed that I would only date/sleep with/marry 1 guy and that it would only take 1 shot for me to meet my true love.  How serious I was, even at the age of 12.  I was so determined and so adamant.  I even made a "3 million dollar bet" at that time because I was so sure and confident in myself and in my prince charming.

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Years later, the exhaustion is sinking in, and I'm feeling less optimistic-- perhaps in a healthy way.  I might have been too optimistic when I was younger.  With my last relationship getting me to such a low point, you might say that I'm swinging to the other extremity now and hopefully getting closer to the middle point.  At present, though, if you could see my soul, you would see that there's an old lady therehunched over from years of anticipating love, dating the wrong guys, and always hoping for the best with every single guy. This old, white-haired lady is emotionally drained and does not have the energy to look anymore.  It may be a good thing because she's too tired to fantasize changing a below-mediocre guy.  She doesn't have the faith or crazy motivation to improve losers so that they can just be prince charming.  At this point, she won't make or many sacrifices and she won't take on another project because she's had enough.  Should the right person come along and fit well into her life, then that would be fantastic.  If not, then she'll continue to move forward, even if it's at a snail's pace, because she's doing OK even if it's on her own.  For the first time ever, she's not taking concerned about Prince Charming or where he is at.  She's not fantasizing about him or what could be between them.  She's just taking things one step at a time, and enjoying the peace that she feels while she's at it.